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Feeling a little tense lately? Do most of your encounters suddenly bring out the disagreeable you? Does life just seem to be against you everywhere you turn? Are your panties constantly in a twist?
You’re in luck! Try the new Ronco Panty De-Twister! In just minutes you’ll have twist free panties and a new lease on life! Just listen to some of our happy customers:
“ I was calling about my credit card balance, and the person on the other end of the line just wasn’t being helpful. My panties were really getting in a twist! But I remembered my Ronco Panty De-Twister, and a few minutes later I was calm and collected. My changed demeanor softened the customer support rep, and I got the info I was looking for!” — Bob T., Dallas
“My next door neighbor wouldn’t trim his tree limbs, and they kept dropping leaves in my yard! I was getting so mad that my panties were twisting something awful! But after a minute or two with my Ronco Panty De-Twister, I was happily raking the leaves into a pile for all the kids to jump in. Now I’m the coolest Dad on the block! Thanks Ronco!” — Dave G., Des Moines
“All I wanted was a fricking date, but the stupid women on Match.com had no appreciation for my listing of cuben in my favorite things list! Can you believe it! Fortunately, I had my Ronco Panty De-Twister handy! Now I’m dating more women than I can handle! I’m ordering one for my friend Bob!” — Doug I., Bowie
Those are just a few of the hundreds of testimonials we receive every week! So don’t wait another minute! Are the police harassing you for driving over the speed limit? Did your mother-in-law just tell you she was moving in? Did your GoLite order get cancelled when you just wanted another color? Don’t get mad, get de-twisted! Your family, and your panties, will thank you for it!
We now return you to our regularly scheduled forum banter…….