Jul 11, 2011 at 5:44 pm #1276583
My boyfriend (Bryce F) would love nothing more than for me to join him on an overnight backpacking trip for his bday in September. I am not a backpacker…a nice weekend for me involves a trip to an art museum and a pedicure. My purse weighs more than Bryce's pack. I hate and really fear bugs and rodents. I have never peed outside–ever–I'm 31. Needless to say I have some concerns about his wish. I'm willing to try new things, but I fear I will turn into whining, complaining, crazy woman. But I think if he can make a few compromises/considerations for our first trip out together we could do this relatively painlessly.
1. I need a tent that has a bottom. He camps with a tarp and even with bug netting and a ground cloth, the thought that a creepy crawly something would crawl in there really skeeves me out. I will NOT be able to sleep. Period. That will make for even crankier girlfriend, so we need a recommendation for an ultralight tent that that is a normal tent with a bottom like our Coleman we use for car camping. Suggestions?
2. I want to hike to a campsite that has a bathroom. We live in Connecticut. Any suggestions for a good beginner day hike where we might end at a campsite that has bathrooms?
I love Bryce. We have a great life together…he just didn't pick an outdoorsy girl, so any help/insights you can provide that are something beyond "grow a pair" would be much appreciated. Unfortunately, I don't believe at 31 I'm going to experience any sort of drastic attitude adjustment when it comes to the outdoors, but I want to do what I can for Bryce without making myself wildly uncomfortable. So if you're a BPL guy with a girly significant other and you've tackled these issues I'd love to hear from you.
KJul 11, 2011 at 5:56 pm #1758210
For us the answer to #1 is the Six Moon Designs Haven tarp and net tent. A two person shelter with his and hers doors for under two pounds.Jul 11, 2011 at 6:01 pm #1758215
@gabe_joyesLocale: Lander, WY
Keep an open mind- you will be amazed what you can get used to. My wife used think the idea of a floorless shelter was insane, but she gave it a shot and now she kind of digs it. Also, I promise going to the bathroom in the woods is way less gross than a nasty out house. Good luck, and just go for it!Jul 11, 2011 at 6:03 pm #1758216
Tim MarshallBPL Member
Good for you giving it a shot!
pretty much any tent from REI's ultralight tent section would work. (my wife needs a real tent too so i understand and am willing to carry a little more weight if it means she will come with me)
also worth consideration are options from LightHeart, Six Moon Design, Gossamer Gear or TarpTent. A good compromise might be a pyramid with bug tent insert, then he can use just the mid for times you stay home. Mountain Laurel Designs, Black Diamond and i believe BearPaw tents have offerings worth a look, as does Golite for both the mid or a "standard" tent.
you guys could always give hammocking a try, I will never sleep on the ground again (ok maybe)
-TimJul 11, 2011 at 6:06 pm #1758217
Chris MorganBPL Member
@chrismorganLocale: Southern Oregon
Spoke too soon…
Also, didn't read the post :)Jul 11, 2011 at 6:08 pm #1758218
Ken HelwigBPL Member
@kennyhel77Locale: Scotts Valley CA via San Jose, CA
+1 on the trollJul 11, 2011 at 6:08 pm #1758219
Katharina LångstrumpBPL Member
@kat_pLocale: Pacific Coast
Who's first post uses the term 'BPLers'?
Someone who has a boyfriend already on BPL. She even wrote his name.Jul 11, 2011 at 6:09 pm #1758220
Brad RogersBPL Member
@mocs123Locale: Southeast Tennessee
1.) Several good choices out there. The Tarptent Double Rainbow is probably most like the Coleman you use for car camping, but the SMD Lunar Duo or Haven would work, as well as the Gossamer Gear Squall, MLD Duomid (with inner), or a plethora of similar shelters.
2.) If you are in Connecticut, you might look at the Appalachian Trail. I haven't made it that far north but many of the shelters on the AT have privy's which are about as close to a bathroom as you are going to get.Jul 11, 2011 at 6:09 pm #1758221
For reference here is out wonderful car-camping tent:
It is certainly bomber and spacious. But please don't even ask how heavy it is. haha.
I couldn't be farther on the the other end of the spectrum from my wonderfully cute GF.
I am a sub-6 backpacking, soon to be sub-5:
We're both dying in our respective corners here where I loath the day I carry more weight, and she would rather die than sleep on the ground w/ no floor.
I was thinking a Hexamid Twin or BearPaw Wilderness Designs Cub Den 2. (I bet I could get Bear Paw to sew in a full bug floor w/ ultralight no-see-um neeting)Jul 11, 2011 at 6:11 pm #1758222
my boyfriend is on this website 24/7. I'm often sitting next to him on the couch as he reads and posts for hours on end…like I'm not even there!
Recognize Bryce F?:)” height=”412″ src=”https://dpcr19kltm61a.cloudfront.net/backpackinglight/user_uploads/1310433072_45973.png” width=”550″ />
Thanks for the input so far. This is great :)Jul 11, 2011 at 6:13 pm #1758223
Ken HelwigBPL Member
@kennyhel77Locale: Scotts Valley CA via San Jose, CA
Hey Bryce and Kathleen, accept my apologies.
Big Agnes makes a lot of tents that are comfortable and lightweight. My wife will not do the tarp thing and when we do trips we bring our Big Agnes SL3Jul 11, 2011 at 6:18 pm #1758225
Chris WBPL Member
Tarptent Scarp 2. My wife and I used this prior to her trying tarping. It's very close to a traditional tent. If you want to PM me I can give you her email address so you can get a female perspective one on one. She's not much of a girly girl in the traditional sense, but she'd be happy to talk with you.Jul 11, 2011 at 6:19 pm #1758226
Tim, much respect to your quilts, but my town just got an REI and I walked in for the first time the other day and was soooo dissappointed. I used to go to stores like REI/EMS and buy tons of stuff! Now I just meander through the isles with a blank stare on my face. I bought Tenacious Tape when I left for $4, that's it, haha. And it took everything for me not to speak to a prospective customer who was being talked into a "light" pack by a salesperson. :o Please don't lead her to REI!!!!! :p
(Gee honey, I wish we had some HIKING photos to show. :p Love ya.)Jul 11, 2011 at 6:22 pm #1758231
That's all. Thanks Tim! ;)Jul 11, 2011 at 6:23 pm #1758232
I will definitely look at the Big Agnes tents. Convincing Bryce we should carry a tent that weights 5 lbs will be a challenge, but we have a Big Agnes 2-person sleeping bag we use car camping that I like a lot.
Chris, The Scarp 2 is only 3.75 lbs…Bryce? What do you think dear? ;) Will PM you. Thanks!Jul 11, 2011 at 6:24 pm #1758233
Try attending mt mn marks school of UL backpacking for girly girls….. Ok sorry about that one and give my appologies to bryce also. Its all a mind set if you think you are going to have a bad time you will So look at all the things that you will not like and try to overcome them b4 you go. There is a book out by Kathlene meyers How to $hit in the woods it really does not do much for me but a past gal I dated and my Ex wife both thought it comical and useful and gave at least one of them some confidence so I guess it was useful. Ive brought a gal out who was very scared of the whole idea but at times the wonders of nature really shine through Like a herd of big horn sheep going by our camp. There is a lot of really cool stuff out in the wilds and there are a lot less dangers than in town. He loves you right? right? After all thats why he waxes his chest hairs plucks his eye brows and watches chick flicks with you all night right?…right? Hope this helpsJul 11, 2011 at 6:27 pm #1758234
Can't I just have her 50mg of Benadryl and they she'd sleep in anything? That's certainly be ultralight, heck SUL.
3.75 lbs for the Scarp is ~2/3rds of my pack weight! :o :p
In all seriousness, Kathleen is a twig and I'm a cripple (major motorcycle accident in 2007, decimated right side of my body). I really don't want to carry a lot of weight, and even though she'd appreciate the full shelter, she'd appreciate the light weight over a nice long hike as well.Jul 11, 2011 at 6:31 pm #1758235
Ryan SmithBPL Member
I listed a few things below that really help my wife be more comfortable while we're hiking/camping. Hopefully they will help you be more comfortable too.
RyanJul 11, 2011 at 6:31 pm #1758236
Hun, how about I carry the tent, you carry everything else? :)
Mark, I will look for that book! Thanks.Jul 11, 2011 at 6:34 pm #1758237
As far as I know there isn't a two person tent out there with a bathtub floor lighter than two pounds. If lightheart gear offered the duo in cuben that might be a possibility. Joe at ZPacks will usually build whatever so you may work with him on a hexamid twin with a cuben floor.Jul 11, 2011 at 6:37 pm #1758239
Eugene SmithBPL Member
@eugeneiusLocale: Nuevo Mexico
Oh man, this has to be a BPL first.
Bryce, listen realllly carefully dude, she's practically spelling it out for you here.
Nano-seeum floor is not a bathtub floor, doesn't sound like Kathleen is thrilled about a pantyhose thin floor, nor does a 5 or 6 lb. baseweight mean much in this case. Quality over quantity.Jul 11, 2011 at 6:38 pm #1758240
– More day hikes
(The challenge is to find time in our busy schedule and find hikes scenic enough in the cruddy area I'm in to keep her interested with scenic vistas and whatnot. This will also allow is to get into shape together for her to handle an overnight.)
– More car camping
(perhaps bring an ultralight shelter to try a night in right next to the car camping tent to fall back on.)
– Day hike w/ hot lunch and longer mileage days.
(Cook a little w/ some relaxation time at a nice spot, then hike some more.
– Overnights at car-camping spot with tarp or UL tent/shelter.
(get her away from car-camping tent and bathrooms)
– Overnight, few miles each way.
(Put it all together in a short overnighter)
Any other suggestions or additions to the plan?Jul 11, 2011 at 6:44 pm #1758243
Kathleen is vegan. I'm not a pro with my hiking diet, but it works for me and I keep it simple. When/If we get there, keeping her nutrition and energy level up will be a learning experience for both of us.
About buying a tent or anything but "the best" (yeah I know, all an opinion), it's very difficult for me. I'm blown through a good amount of money to get to some of the lighter stuff out there. I realize she has to be comfy in order to embrace this activity in the slightest, but it pains me to buy 3-4 times over. I'd rather buy a Bear Paw 2 or Hexamid Twin w/ full bug floor and polycro ground sheet and then sell it if she isn't game. Hrmmm…..Heck she doesn't even have non-cotton hiking gear yet. We'd really have to plan this out well.
Maybe I'd borrow a shelter from a BPLer.Jul 11, 2011 at 6:52 pm #1758244
Do your boyfriend a favor and don't.
Find a place with awesome day hikes and rustic cabins.Jul 11, 2011 at 7:00 pm #1758246
John NausiedaBPL Member
Sorry but I think you need a listen to the Beatles doing " You're going to lose that girl." Look Out.
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