"Still, I think you would have a better time convincing the general hiking public to bag out their TP than to use their hands."
You're probably right.
I really don't get people, though.
We're animals! We make smelly messes and funny noises! Don't be afraid!
One thing that I think hasn't really been clarified…(how do I put this without getting censored?)
Mike might mention some of this in his article, I forget…(If not then I'm the smart one!)
Unlike the toilet, when assuming a proper squat your plumbing is aligned well (I think this is the posture our bodies were made for- think about it) and you should get very little poo, if any, on yourself. Then there's not much to wipe!
It's not like you're using your bare hand and some water and scooping globs off yourself here folks!!!
A few small rocks or leaves or some grass and a deft hand should be all you need- there's practically nothing left by the time you wash yourself- if you even have to (not excluding hands).
I would argue it's no different than using TP at home and then jumping in the shower and properly washing.
I'm assuming the "civilized" amongst us at least do this, right?
Is it scary? I hope not!
SAME THING!!!

