Strangest stuff found in a beginner's backpack

I’m imagining that baby carefully swadled and tucked into the drum for the hike. Is that wrong?

I’m not sure how the heck they did it.  Me myself?  I carried in the 14 foot diameter canvas tipi cover (just visible background left).

On the West Coast Trail last summer I saw all sorts of crazy stuff. Multiple people carrying Steel tripod campfire grills, lawn chairs, cases of beer. At the first campsite we found a full size cast iron griddle. and on the second day found a whole ripe Mango at a lunch spot. (We ate it)

That trail does not seem to attract light weight hikers. At the half way point of the trail (35km in) there is a weigh in scale and we saw two guys bragging that their packs were over 100lbs. The looks me and my brother got when our packs were in the mid 20’s.

A few years ago on the High Sierra Trail, I saw a ranger packing out an abandoned queen size air bed with battery powered inflator.

But my favorite was when a friend pulled a duraflame log out of his pack.  This was quite intentionally ridiculous – we had less than 2 miles in down a gentle, half-paved grade, for the first night of 3.  We burnt it that night.

A Duraflame log is fuel. So it doesn’t count against your base weight.

Ha!

I suppose you could cook breakfast over your burning queen size air bed?

A blower dryer (110v AC) along with a full size bottle of shampoo, another of conditioner, and a makeup kit. (No stove/fuel, water filter or toilet paper though!). Since that debacle I’ve been much more selective of my backpacking partners.

I dont know if I should admit this….I’m a Scout Master,  took a few newer scouts on a easy 4mile back packing trip. One scout proceeds to pull a ice chest…?… he brought sushi for dinner…….

This year I inspected all their pack prior to the trip  all good.. except we get to our destination  9 miles in. That same scout now has 7 frozen bottles of water and 2 full size pool blow up loung chairs for the lake……

That same scout now has 7 frozen bottles of water and 2 full size pool blow up loung chairs for the lake……

Hahahaha.  Ya know whut?  Assuming he hauled all that 9 mi into the backcountry without saying a word (because otherwise you’d have know about it before you got there), he sounds like a trooper!  Well done :)

Someone hid a pineapple in my pack “as the perfect thing to go with the freeze-dried jambalaya” that I was carrying. Not a bad idea but packing out the inedible parts was a bit messy. I always suspected that the culprit was the fellow who stuffed a six bottles of Corona into his pack. Made for a good laugh and a great dinner though.

Every beginner I’ve hiked with has skipped the crucial step of not repeatedly checking their pack throughout the day for my “extra” beer.

It’s a crucial step to miss, for both of us…

;)

Many years ago my buddy and I had to argue sternly that the 3rd member of our party should NOT bring his Hitler Youth sheath knife AND his pocket knife. The sheath knife reluctantly went back in his car.

I hiked with a thru hiker on the AT whose handle was “Skillet”. (Yes, he began the thru hike in GA with a small cast iron skillet!) By the time my buddy and I met him in Virginia he was a well seasoned backpacker. No more skillet.

A 1 lb. ball peen hammer, which was used to pound in stakes for the two Zpacks Duplex tents they’d brought.

I was hiking out on the Manzana trail and met a group of young guys who were carrying a full-sized cooler and full-sized folding canvas chairs, the kind that kind of scrunch up and have cup-holders in the arm rests. They would walk a few feet and stop to rest for a while, then hike another few feet, then rest again. As long as they had a good time I suppose it doesn’t really matter.

Once I went on a trip in high school and found some firewood about 2 miles from the camp so I put a log on top of my pack. I could barely walk after that.

Saw four kids carry one of these, along with cans of soup, into a shelter on the AT.

They also had a carton of shelf-stable milk and a big box of cereal.

Did someone mention FRUIT??  Me and my backpacking buddies have an Appalachian mountain tradition—humping out a full watermelon during the trip.  If successful (sometimes the watermelon slides out from under the top pack lid)—they are inducted into the exclusive Melon Club.

I carried my Melon into Pisgah on Upper Creek back in 1985.  Johnny B brought in his Melon in the spring of 1988. Before the Age of Cameras. We old geezers have style.

Even the youngsters are getting in on the act as my backpacking buddy Patman, 20 years my junior, has humped in several melons over the years—to surprise me.  Photo proof?  Oh heck yes—

Patman doing a Melon Dance in Bald River Gorge wilderness.

Patman with Melon on Slickrock Creek.  (Check out his Seek Outside pack).

Melon Boy surprises me with his Melon in the Big Frog wilderness.

Had a Scout carry hardback copies of the 4th and 5th Harry Potter books.  No idea when he thought he would read so much on a 1 night trip.

We were talking to some old guys at a backcountry camp once who told us stories of the good old days. One time they were getting ready for a trip and one of them snuck a 12-pack of beer into the other guy’s backpack without him seeing it. At the end of the day he complains, my pack just feels so heavy, I don’t get it. Snickering, the first guy tells him to open his pack, which he does, and then discovers the beer. He replies, “Oh yeah? Well look in your pack!” Which he does and pulls out a whole frozen turkey. Good times, they said as they handed us a cold one out of a big red cooler. We were 16 miles from the nearest road. We asked, why did you bring so much beer? They pointed to their horses grazing in a nearby clearing, “Because we can.”

My second trip I brought a darbuka. Totally worth it though to play around campfire with no humans within 8 or 10 miles.

I’ve seen numerous beginners with a bunch of mid-sized rocks in their packs.  …Dunno how they got there…

My second trip I brought a darbuka. Totally worth it though to play around campfire with no humans within 8 or 10 miles.

Probably scared there might be cannibals.