Worst backcountry meal ever?

[JASON CUZZETTO]

I have two.

A Pad Thai Tofu from a major brand (Back Country Pantry – Pretty sure?)I couldn't get to not be crunchy and hard, no matter how long I cooked it. My wife is still trying to get me to eat the other one I have in the pantry, NO WAY. Not to mention it had no flavor.

The other was the dehydrated 'Fruit Co–tail (<–profanity detector) Patty' that I would get in the Army. No matter how many times I tried to eat it, it was just way to much sugar. And if you actually added water to the pouch it was even worse. Like a smooth pasty sweet bit of vomit. Blah!!!

[Sarah Kirkconnell]

Lol…I was also starving. Amazing what we will eat when hungry ;-)

5 years ago on a PCT trip we came to a camp where horse packers had been the night before and they had left a smoldering fire. As we put it out we found a bunch of foil wrapped taters and sausage in it. I look over and one of my guy buddies was munching away. That man will eat nearly anything…..

[William Zila]

imagine this chicken alfredo yumm =) imagine your buddy substituting milk with "powdered milk" it was actually french vanilla creamer…. and then piling it all in my sp700 mug putting the lid on cranking my soto stove up all the way and then leaving it. nasty

[David Adair]

>so I figured I could leave a 4 person MH raspberry crumble dessert out for a few hours. Oh not. Came back to camp to find it riddled with holes from a squirrel or chipmunk. I still ate it. While wondering just how much rodent slobber was in there……<

Sarah: Actually you're very lucky, rodent slobber can lead to a very serious condition as I can attest. It has to do with exposure to squirrel saliva or under cooked squirrel meat. Evidently, the very virile digestive biota of the squirrel overwhelm and replace the normal human digestive bacteria.

I will paraphrase the health advisory:

"The effects can be debilitating for the afflicted. They suffer, as do family,friends and coworkers. Social awkwardness is common. Many times the afflicted will suffer what, in legal parlance, is referred to as "a loss of consortium". It is also not altogether uncommon for secondary soft tissue injury to occur as a result of repetitive tensile stress in one or more digits of either hand, particularly among rednecks.

The effects of the bacteria on the squirrel itself are not altogether well known, possibly because few researchers have actually ridden in an enclosed vehicle with a squirrel. The prognosis is not altogether dismal, however, as digestion has been shown to improve for those individuals adhering to a strict diet of white pine nuts."

Upon further reflection, this could also explain the terrible noises witnessed by Craig and Edward in the Sespe. If a squirrel eating jaguar were so afflicted this would explain the contradictory "barking" noises that were heard in conjunction with the feline sounding screams. The only question is: were the terrible noises accompanied by a horrific smell?

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