hilarious! i'll never look at that the same way again. :D
Topic
16 lb Dilemma
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On the JMT I wouldn't (and haven't) treated any water. It is entirely possible to only drink water up high from above where most people camp and from visibly melting snow. Even if you want to treat your water, you should repackage your water treatment chemicals in 0.5 fl oz eye dropper bottles, easily can last your JMT trip.
My suggestion would be to get a 20 oz. o.j. bottle and keep it either in your hand or easily accessible in a side pocket. See water, fill, drink, refill, drink again over the next 15 minutes. No need to carry any water longer than 20 minutes for most of the JMT.
I can't imagine needing down pants in the summer. I only carry rain pants and the shorts I hike in and am plenty warm.
Unless you're going with a significant other there is absolutely no reason to wash underwear or socks more than every 3-4 days and no need for extra undies. Same goes for t-shirt.
For all other suggestions I will refer your to Mike C!'s earlier post.
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