Apr 21, 2012 at 10:15 am #1288991
Wonderful piece in the Tribune.
Full text is at: http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/ct-talk-huppke-obit-facts-20120419,0,809470.story
In memoriam: After years of health problems, Facts has finally died.
By Rex W. Huppke, Chicago Tribune reporter
April 19, 2012
A quick review of the long and illustrious career of Facts reveals some of the world's most cherished absolutes: Gravity makes things fall down; 2 + 2 = 4; the sky is blue.
But for many, Facts' most memorable moments came in simple day-to-day realities, from a child's certainty of its mother's love to the comforting knowledge that a favorite television show would start promptly at 8 p.m.
Over the centuries, Facts became such a prevalent part of most people's lives that Irish philosopher Edmund Burke once said: "Facts are to the mind what food is to the body."
To the shock of most sentient beings, Facts died Wednesday, April 18, after a long battle for relevancy with the 24-hour news cycle, blogs and the Internet. Though few expected Facts to pull out of its years-long downward spiral, the official cause of death was from injuries suffered last week when Florida Republican Rep. Allen West steadfastly declared that as many as 81 of his fellow members of the U.S. House of Representatives are communists.
Facts held on for several days after that assault — brought on without a scrap of evidence or reason — before expiring peacefully at its home in a high school physics book. Facts was 2,372.
"American society has lost confidence that there's a single alternative," she said. "Anybody can express an opinion on a blog or any other outlet and there's no system of verification or double-checking, you just say whatever you want to and it gets magnified. It's just kind of a bizarre world in which one person's opinion counts as much as anybody else's."
Facts is survived by two brothers, Rumor and Innuendo, and a sister, Emphatic Assertion.
Services are alleged to be private. In lieu of flowers, the family requests that mourners make a donation to their favorite super PAC.Apr 21, 2012 at 10:20 am #1869664
Great post Doug. Mike Royko would be proud.Apr 21, 2012 at 10:24 am #1869665
@retiredjerryLocale: Oregon and Washington
Are you telling me there aren't 81 communists in the U.S. House of Representatives???Apr 21, 2012 at 12:24 pm #1869681
Explain why 360 B.C. (or B.C.E it you are more "modern") is the birth year of our dearly departed Facts?Apr 21, 2012 at 12:35 pm #1869682
Facts was born in ancient Greece, the brainchild of famed philosopher Aristotle. Poovey said that in its youth, Facts was viewed as "universal principles that everybody agrees on" or "shared assumptions."Apr 21, 2012 at 1:11 pm #1869690
Jeremy and AngelaParticipant
@requiemLocale: Northern California
Ironically, it does seem this was about the same year Plato wrote his story of Atlantis.Apr 21, 2012 at 1:39 pm #1869698
Jerry. There are exactly 57 communists in the House.Apr 21, 2012 at 1:51 pm #1869700
@obxcolaLocale: Outer Banks of North Carolina
That was a good one Doug.
Funny no mention of the 69 members that are extra-terrestrial aliens.
About that Atlantis: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ry5IyzuDIBcApr 21, 2012 at 3:53 pm #1869726
"Mike Royko would be proud."
Lord, how I miss the old curmudgeon.Apr 21, 2012 at 4:29 pm #1869737
When I was in college my Mom would cut out every column and mail them to me. I treasured each one. I found this first search .
http://www.press.uchicago.edu/Misc/Chicago/730719.htmlApr 21, 2012 at 4:49 pm #1869741
Ben 2 WorldParticipant
@ben2worldLocale: So Cal
You should be happy. After all, words just mean whatever we want them to mean, correct? And Facts are whatever we say they are. :)
When everybody is right… when everyone gets a "yes" — the reality is that no one is right and no one is getting anything.Apr 21, 2012 at 5:12 pm #1869746
" I found this first search ."
Vintage Royko, John. The first one, in particular, had me rolling on the floor. Mike and Hizzoner needed each other, a symbiotic relationship if ever there was one. Royko was never the same after Hizzoner died in 1987. His raison d'etre gone, the life just seeped out of Mike, and it showed in his later columns. I lived in Chicago from 1967-72, and never missed a Royko column that I know of-too bad I didn't collect them. He was flat out the funniest and, at the same time, most perceptive political columnist in Chicago at the time, maybe ever. He really understood how Chicago worked. Anyhow, thanks for taking me back to, if not a kinder gentler, then at least a more humorous time.Apr 21, 2012 at 5:50 pm #1869753
You bet Tom. I grew up in Chicago and then left it after I was 18 , but I go back every year. Mike and Studs Terkel were Chicago. I'm from the South Side. I rode in the elevator with Mayor Daley when my brother made it to the Science Fair finals at the Museum of Science and Industry.I had dreams of him saying to me " Feed My Machine". And it is sad that so many fans of SNL in its heyday don't understand that that crew came from Second City and visited the Billygoat Tavern where Royko hung."Cheezeeburger, Pepsi No Coke".And I understood how Boeing could make the move. If the next Portland Mayor is as bad as Sam Adams I'll be tempted too. But the Coast and the Cascades are in my DNA by now…Apr 21, 2012 at 7:01 pm #1869773
"I'm from the South Side."
Talk about a small world; I lived on Ogilvie and 69th, in South Shore for a couple of years after a stint in Hyde Park. Those were interesting times in Chicago.
"And it is sad that so many fans of SNL in its heyday don't understand that that crew came from Second City and visited the Billygoat Tavern where Royko hung."Cheezeeburger, Pepsi No Coke".
I used to go there for a burger occasionally on my lunch hour. I saw Royko once but was afraid to approach him and try to strike up a conversation. Now, I wish I had…. :(
"If the next Portland Mayor is as bad as Sam Adams I'll be tempted too. But the Coast and the Cascades are in my DNA by now…"
When I left in 72, I made a beeline for The Bay Area and never looked back. Still, when I get fed up with the dysfunctional bunch of clowns that pass for a government here in Seattle, which is very often, I look back fondly on Chicago. For all its rough edges and petty corruption, the city always worked. Now, if the place just had some mountains and decent weather, I might also be tempted. Still, my DNA says the West Coast is home.
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