Y’all are insanely creatve

[Ray Crampton]

I sometimes wonder if this is actually a group of ex-cons that learned how to make the most out of what was available in a 6' x 8' jail cell.

I can imagine you're walking down the trail and there's any old piece of trash on the side… say… a tennis ball can. Your first thought is – geez, some crazy nut carried this thing all the way up this hill and then left it on the side of the trail! Not only that, but maybe 100 hikers have walked by it and left it there. This is nuts!

You're not thinking of litter or inconsiderate people. You're wondering how anyone could pass by a perfectly good tortilla container that you could in fact also store water, first aid supplies, a telescope, camera monopod, and start fires using magnification of the suns rays.

In fact, before you arrived there was just a tennis ball can. After you left the can is gone and there's a pile of 8 pieces of gear from your backpack that you threw on the ground which you no longer needed after you picked it up.

I can imagine being in a shelter and one of you keeps staring at me. About midnight your friend holds me down and you proceed to forcibly pull my belly button lint out and make a run for it down the trail because you think it's a better, lighter emergency firestarter than an esbit tablet!

"Did you see how greasy that guy was? This thing will burn for 3 minutes, easy!"

[Jim Colten]

I sometimes wonder if this is actually a group of ex-cons that learned how to make the most out of what was available in a 6' x 8' jail cell.

6' x 8' cell? No self respecting ultralighter would need more than 3' x 7' (with a 2.5' ceiling height. he-he

Other than that, I think you've penned the best and most concise profile of ultralighters I've ever read. Thanks!

[Steven Evans]

"You're wondering how anyone could pass by a perfectly good tortilla container that you could in fact also store water, first aid supplies, a telescope, camera monopod, and start fires using magnification of the suns rays."

LOL! I needed that…thanks. :)

[te – wa]

"Did you see how greasy that guy was? This thing will burn for 3 minutes, easy!"

ha! now THATS funny! you gotta love it

[Michael Davis]

Ray, you need to write a guide on ultralight techniques, maybe you can get Mike McLelland to illustrate it. Should be a huge success!

Loved your post!

[Huzefa @ Blue Bolt Gear]

lol! thanks for the laugh.

[Diplomatic Mike]

LOL! The only thing you got wrong Ray, was the leaving behind of 8 pieces of gear. A true UL hiker would have used the gear to create a fire for a 'cook-up', thus being able to pour out 20g worth of fuel! :)

[Vick Hines]

ULers are opportunists like prisoners or hobos. And LNTers travel like fugitives on the run or a patrol on deep recon. Interesting images. And true. Maybe we should cross-fertilize with those other subcultures. You first.

[Andy Bailey]

Ask every hiker you meet on the trail "You're not one of THEM, are you?" Proceed to tell the bewildered hiker that "They are out to get me, watching my every move."

[Jesse Glover]

I've been to jail, and you are so right you might not know it. We used to make ramen in the sink with hot tap water. OG no cook meal

[Lynn Tramper]

I think that is the funniest thing I have read on this website. It can only be so funny because it's sooo close to the truth! Oh man, the times I've sat around camp watching other (un-enlightened) campers,shaking my head at what they carry (or don't carry) makes it all the more funny.

[Ray Crampton]

Glad you guys enjoyed the post. I make jokes with my wife all the time referring to this forum. If we walk through the mall I'll note some rediculous dual-use idea.

Like a shirt from the big & tall store eliminates the need for pants and underwear. It also lets you pee while you run down the trail adding to your miles, reducing pounds of food per mile. A long enough shirt can be torn throughout the week to use as toilet paper. Tear some clean shirt off and swallow it once a day and you may not need toilet paper at all. Tear off one sleeve to use as a bandana. Soak the other sleeve in vaseline to put on chapped lips, or tear some off as a fire starter.

OK, we just need them to make tall shirts from Tyvek and it's a done deal!

If this was a forum for lightweight cycling I think we'd all agree to go to a unicycle with lightweight tires and only one pedal.

[Michael Mangold]

Here's double duty for you. Not only can you do what nature demands, but you can, oh, never mind…
I caught this at a Cub Scout meeting of all places…

[Michael Crosby]

Very creative, and a little scary, as others have attested.

[D G]

I made a shank out of the handle of my toothbrush. Now I don't need to carry a knife.

[Denis Hazlewood]

…and handy for close in work if caught in a fight while brushing your teeth.

[Kevin Egelhoff]

Nothing better then the prison issue "finger cot" tooth brush … JUST 1.4 grams (0.049 oz.) Can't use it to poke a bears eye out but it sure is light for a tooth brush! And yes … I really use them !!

[Joseph Jacaruso]

>I've been to jail, and you are so right you might not know it. We used to make ramen in the sink with hot tap water. OG no cook meal<

In college we cooked hot dogs the same way.

[Larry Dyer]

What's scary and one ups the sink is the toilet. And yes I've seen it done… the only advantage is the easy clean up.

And no, before,anyone asks I didn't partake of that meal.

[Rick Dreher]

I thought everybody knew the dorm method for hot dogs involves a lamp cord and two metal forks? Sheesh, what are they teaching our kids these days? :-)

Fun thread!

Cheers,

Rick

>In college we cooked hot dogs the same way.

[Roger Caffin]

Hi Rick

> dorm method for hot dogs involves a lamp cord and two metal forks
It's all those PC lefties … they don't approve of San Quentin any more.

Cheers

[Nick Truax]

Good thread, good laughs.

I suppose we're all a little crazy when it comes to this UL BPing world. But in a good way.

Keep up the good work y'all!

[Mark Regalia]

Kevin – out side of going to prison where do get those. I've been eyeing my dog's toothbrush, which is similiar. Now there is dual usage, sharing a toothbrush with your dogs on the trail. You could also use it scrub out pans. After you scrub out the pan you won't need toothpaste for the dog. They'll love the added flavor. Though you may have to stop them from eating the tooth brush, with your finger in it.

[Thomas Burns]

So where do you get those "finger cot" toothbrushes?

Stargazer

[James Patsalides]

So, similac and other synthetic baby milk companies give away kits to the parents of newborns, and they often contain one of them, we got three when my daughter was born and we never used them. I actually tried to use one as a UL toothbrush, and it was OK. If you don't want to hang about at the infant-toddler group at your local maternity hospital, you can also pick them up for a buck or two at your local pharmacy, in the baby section. Again, beware of hanging out in the baby section at the pharmacy, some have security guards looking out for "lurkers". ;-)

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